philosophical bullshit

Work sucked hard tonight.

I'm over this job but I can't quit. I'm addicted to the money.

There's a girl who keeps trying to get me to join her soft core porn site and I'm considering it. I don't want to deal with people in person anymore. I get angry-physically mad-at the customers.

I don't want a future. I don't want to finish school and get a 'respectable' job. I don't want a boyfriend or a house or kids or a dog. I don't want friends. I just want to make money and buy the things I want and take solace in the fact that I care about no one.

I just want to know that people want me but can never have me. Sometimes I wonder if I even have a personality. I try and think about how I feel and what constitutes those feelings and there's nothing. Just blankness.

I find it impossible to make the things I say and do reflect how I really feel because I don't know. I can't grasp the concept of other peoples' feelings. I only feel bad for myself.

Pissed off.

Everyone in my life seems extra incompetent right now.

My retarded roommate has invited his pregnant sister to stay with us at our apartment until she has her kid. I like his sister, she's a really cool girl, and I really have no problem with her staying for a few weeks. The problem is that dumb-fuck roommate is going out of town for 5 days while his sister (and her sketchy boyfriend) crashes at our place. I don't care if you invite a family member in need to stay with you but don't be so fucking inconsiderate as to skip town for a week. Now I have to put my life on hold so he can do whatever the fuck he wants. Selfish fuck.

I'm so sick of work and haven't made jack shit lately.

I hardly ever go to school, so I can't complain too much about that, but I'm not doing that well due to my lack of attendance.

I'm super grumpy because I'm hungry and have to lose 5 lbs by Monday and I just want everyone to die.