Work went surprisingly well for me last night. I didn't drink (too much), I got a vip, and I did lots of very clean dances. I didn't make a ton of money, but I made enough.
I've lost some weight, so I think that may have something to do with it. I always feel a bit more confident when I'm skinnier. I've been taking this fatburner stuff, and while I'm skeptical about its fat burning ability, it does kill my appetite. In fact, it depletes me of my appetite so well that I've taken to smoking weed in order to make food appealing and tasty enough for me to eat it.
Actually I've been smoking a lot lately because I'm finally starting to appreciate my weed buzz.
The pill also gives me a weird but awesome buzz when combined with a bit of alcohol (it does say not to use alcohol while using it), which has upped my productivity at work.
I hung out with another stripper friend of mine on Friday. We went halloween costume shopping for work in the hippie district of my city. Then we went to the liquor store and rented Barbarella because I had never seen it. My friend got pretty trashed and was hitting on me so that was a bit awkward. She has a fiance so I don't know what's up with that.
It seems that most of my female friends try and sleep with me. I'm the least sexual person alive and no one seems to notice.
Haven't talked to the ex in ages. It's a good thing. I guess.
Anyways, the girl I hung out with is on alcohol restriction at work (she's more of an alcoholic than myself) so she's been in a bad mood at work lately due to her sobriety.
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Friday, October 22, 2010
My first night in a clean club (ha)
Last night as my fellow strippers and I were about to leave the dressing room the house mom stops everyone and tells us she has two announcements.
First, the dressing room is being renovated (YAY) so get all your ho shit out of your locker.
Second, in an effort to clean up the club the rules concerning floor dances are going to be strictly adhered to. If a floor man sees your breaking the rules you'll be sent home.
Now, if you know anything about atlanta strip clubs you'll know that the law here dictates that all floor dances must be completed 6 inches away from the customer and no contact is allowed. This means; no grinding, two feet on the floor at all times, no leaning against a customers chest, no sitting on laps, no boobs in face shakes...etc. If you know anything about atlanta strip clubs you'd all know that these rules are generally disregarded.
It had gotten especially bad in my club as of late. You'd see girls grind for an entire song out on the floor. That's what VIP's for dammit.
So, after this announcement we all head out to the floor. At first you see no dances going on. Then I get summoned to do a dance. Only then did I realize how many rules I'd been breaking with my dances, and I'm a relatively clean dancer. Hmmm, going to have to incorporate some new moves into my dances.
As my friend and I look around we notice some girls haven't changed their ways at all. Do I see any girls sent home or even given a warning? NO. Basically I'm going to go ahead and bet that nothing changes.
While I'm proud of my club's half-assed attempt to clean itself up, I really wish they had started with more important issues like the girls who suck and fuck in the back or use to the club as a prostitute dating center.
I decided last night that I wanted to be a 'floor man' (bouncer). I took over the front door floor guy's post for a while. The club must have been really dead 'cause they didn't even tell me to quit hamming it up and pretty much let me be floor guy for a night.
At the end of the night I asked the manager how I could procure a floor guy position and he looked at me and laughed. Oh well.
First, the dressing room is being renovated (YAY) so get all your ho shit out of your locker.
Second, in an effort to clean up the club the rules concerning floor dances are going to be strictly adhered to. If a floor man sees your breaking the rules you'll be sent home.
Now, if you know anything about atlanta strip clubs you'll know that the law here dictates that all floor dances must be completed 6 inches away from the customer and no contact is allowed. This means; no grinding, two feet on the floor at all times, no leaning against a customers chest, no sitting on laps, no boobs in face shakes...etc. If you know anything about atlanta strip clubs you'd all know that these rules are generally disregarded.
It had gotten especially bad in my club as of late. You'd see girls grind for an entire song out on the floor. That's what VIP's for dammit.
So, after this announcement we all head out to the floor. At first you see no dances going on. Then I get summoned to do a dance. Only then did I realize how many rules I'd been breaking with my dances, and I'm a relatively clean dancer. Hmmm, going to have to incorporate some new moves into my dances.
As my friend and I look around we notice some girls haven't changed their ways at all. Do I see any girls sent home or even given a warning? NO. Basically I'm going to go ahead and bet that nothing changes.
While I'm proud of my club's half-assed attempt to clean itself up, I really wish they had started with more important issues like the girls who suck and fuck in the back or use to the club as a prostitute dating center.
I decided last night that I wanted to be a 'floor man' (bouncer). I took over the front door floor guy's post for a while. The club must have been really dead 'cause they didn't even tell me to quit hamming it up and pretty much let me be floor guy for a night.
At the end of the night I asked the manager how I could procure a floor guy position and he looked at me and laughed. Oh well.
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Like it used to be
Tonight reminded me of the old days.
Made $600 with minimal effort, like I should.
I had one half-hour vip with another girl and two guys. They were young, and pretty cute. Especially mine. I generally date guys a bit older than myself because... I don't actually know why... but I have to admit that there's something about the younger guys that's appealing. They're so...healthy. And more innocent. Also, appreciative. You'd think the older guys would be more appreciative seeing as they're old and less physically attractive, but no. Old guys (at least the ones I date) take me for granted.
The rest of my money I made off working the floor. I was fairly drunk most of the night (as I said, like the old days) but managed to sober up in time to drive.
My last customer of the night was a wacko. He was fuuuuucked up on coke and just really out there. He would tip me on stage by arranging dollar bills in a very precise pattern on stage. He also kept talking about living in a tent and joining the army.
The ex tried to hang out with me this weekend but I was out of town. I think (know) I need to end it with him. I think I'm going to text him something along these lines next time he tries to hang out,
"I already told you I don't want to be one of your fuckbuddies and that seems to be exactly what you're after so I don't see a reason for us to hang out. Cheers."
Yes? No?
Made $600 with minimal effort, like I should.
I had one half-hour vip with another girl and two guys. They were young, and pretty cute. Especially mine. I generally date guys a bit older than myself because... I don't actually know why... but I have to admit that there's something about the younger guys that's appealing. They're so...healthy. And more innocent. Also, appreciative. You'd think the older guys would be more appreciative seeing as they're old and less physically attractive, but no. Old guys (at least the ones I date) take me for granted.
The rest of my money I made off working the floor. I was fairly drunk most of the night (as I said, like the old days) but managed to sober up in time to drive.
My last customer of the night was a wacko. He was fuuuuucked up on coke and just really out there. He would tip me on stage by arranging dollar bills in a very precise pattern on stage. He also kept talking about living in a tent and joining the army.
The ex tried to hang out with me this weekend but I was out of town. I think (know) I need to end it with him. I think I'm going to text him something along these lines next time he tries to hang out,
"I already told you I don't want to be one of your fuckbuddies and that seems to be exactly what you're after so I don't see a reason for us to hang out. Cheers."
Yes? No?
Sunday, October 17, 2010
On developing a personality
Worked monday, tuesday, wednesday, and thursday of last week. Complete and utter shit, every. single. day.
Monday was sad. I don't even remember it very well. Left at 1:00 with just over $200. Was able to drive home.
Tuesday was...slightly better than monday. Old asian man came in but didn't spend as much as usual. Left at one with just under $300. Once I got home I decided to polish off a bottle of vodka because I was mad about work sucking. Then I decided to email both colorado guy [sorry :)] and the ex. I'm pretty sure I also attached a picture of my boobs to the email. Sometimes I swear I'm 16 years old.
Wednesday I got trashed. The beginning of the night held promise. I made tons of money on stage and everyone seemed to love me. Unfortunately I drank. A lot.
My night in drinks went something like this:
~Two shots at the bar, stage.
~Sitting with a customer, three more shots.
~Friends join me-share two vodka redbulls.
~Share a hennessy cranberry with a friend.
~Join up with friend who is celebrating her birthday and drink a shot of patron.
~Random table, one more shot of vodka.
~Table with cute black guy-one shot of patron.
~Back to the bar for one more vodka redbull shared.
~Drink total: 12
Very unable to drive home.
I also remember hitting on my manager and maybe the bouncers. Of course they had to make fun of me all night thursday for being a lush.
Me and the birthday girl ended up splitting a cab and she crashed at my place. She was trashed and arguing with her hood rat boyfriend over the phone all night. He beats the shit out of her pretty regularly.
Thursday I took it easy on the alcohol. Did maybe 2 shots all night. Left early with just over $200. Acted really out of it all night. I think people probably thought I was on something.
I was talking with the bouncer who's in love with me (wants to fuck me) and he basically told me that I have a shitty personality and that I was born tall and skinny and pretty and get by on my looks so I never had to develop a good personality. For the record mr. bouncer, I like my personality and think I'm hilarious so I don't know what you're talking about.
I barely made a grand last week and worked four nights! Four fucking nights. It's weeks like these that make me feel like this job isn't worth it. I just have to remind myself that I made over 3 grand in one night a few weeks ago and that's how this crazy job goes.
Monday was sad. I don't even remember it very well. Left at 1:00 with just over $200. Was able to drive home.
Tuesday was...slightly better than monday. Old asian man came in but didn't spend as much as usual. Left at one with just under $300. Once I got home I decided to polish off a bottle of vodka because I was mad about work sucking. Then I decided to email both colorado guy [sorry :)] and the ex. I'm pretty sure I also attached a picture of my boobs to the email. Sometimes I swear I'm 16 years old.
Wednesday I got trashed. The beginning of the night held promise. I made tons of money on stage and everyone seemed to love me. Unfortunately I drank. A lot.
My night in drinks went something like this:
~Two shots at the bar, stage.
~Sitting with a customer, three more shots.
~Friends join me-share two vodka redbulls.
~Share a hennessy cranberry with a friend.
~Join up with friend who is celebrating her birthday and drink a shot of patron.
~Random table, one more shot of vodka.
~Table with cute black guy-one shot of patron.
~Back to the bar for one more vodka redbull shared.
~Drink total: 12
Very unable to drive home.
I also remember hitting on my manager and maybe the bouncers. Of course they had to make fun of me all night thursday for being a lush.
Me and the birthday girl ended up splitting a cab and she crashed at my place. She was trashed and arguing with her hood rat boyfriend over the phone all night. He beats the shit out of her pretty regularly.
Thursday I took it easy on the alcohol. Did maybe 2 shots all night. Left early with just over $200. Acted really out of it all night. I think people probably thought I was on something.
I was talking with the bouncer who's in love with me (wants to fuck me) and he basically told me that I have a shitty personality and that I was born tall and skinny and pretty and get by on my looks so I never had to develop a good personality. For the record mr. bouncer, I like my personality and think I'm hilarious so I don't know what you're talking about.
I barely made a grand last week and worked four nights! Four fucking nights. It's weeks like these that make me feel like this job isn't worth it. I just have to remind myself that I made over 3 grand in one night a few weeks ago and that's how this crazy job goes.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Annoyances
Work last night was...annoying. Really my whole day yesterday was annoying.
It started at 10:30 in the morning. Woken up by the ringing of my cell phone I answer groggily. It's a girl friend of mine who wants to discuss her man failures with me at 10:30 in the morning. Annoyance #1.
"why do these guys I sleep with want nothing to do with me other than to fuck me? It makes me feel like shit"
"Do you like them?"
"No, not really."
"Well, you can either sleep with them and just enjoy the sex and not feel bad about it or you can not sleep with them."
"I only sleep with them when I'm drunk."
"Don't drink so much..."
I'm not really one to give advice in this department, but it's loads easier to dole out advice than to follow it. Plus, this girl puts my drinking to shame. She gets blackout drunk every damn weekend. I drink a lot but rarely to the point of completely blacking out; just to the point of fuzzyish memories :(
Around 12:00 I gather up some motivation and make it out to the game. Of course we all drink for the two hours preceding the game so I'm fairly drunk by the time it starts. I then realize that it's sort of late and that I'm working that night so I start to walk back to the condo to get my car and drive home. I saw absolutely none of the game. Annoyance #2.
On my walk I'm approached by a man who starts to converse with me. Turns out he's a 29 year old grad student at my school and that's all I remember about him due to my prior alcohol intake. I'm pretty sure I gave him my number because I had a text of the friendly variety in my phone from an unknown number after work last night. He was pretty cute so maybe I'll hang out with him one of these days.
After I make it home I pass out. Fortunately I wake up just in time to prepare myself for a night of nudity. I'm still buzzed when I get to work, so in the spirit of saturday night I keep the buzz going with 3 or 4 vodka redbulls and some glasses of NUVO.
Being somewhat slow for a saturday night a friend and I decide to try a new style of hustle. We approach the customers and immediately sit on their laps. We angle ourselves so that our boobs are right in their faces and wiggle them a bit. Then we ask if they'd like to see us naked. This strategy was surprisingly effective and required little to no conversation. Score!
A regular of mine came in last night, but unfortunately he came in quite late and the vip rooms were booked for the rest of the evening. Instead of getting $400 out of him I only got $120. This was annoyance #3.
As the end of the night approached I went to the back to breathalyze and someone managed to not pass with a .098. WTF? I drank less than normal at work so I guess the drinking earlier in the day combined with the fact that I hadn't eaten any actual food that day caused me to fail. This was annoyance #4 as none of the girls who normally drive me home were there so I was forced to take a cab.
This means I was without my car most of the day today, until 7:00 when a work friend picked me up on her way to the club. I have no food in the house so I was starving all day and don't live within walking distance to any food. Annoyance #5.
I caved and texted the ex yesterday as I hadn't heard from him in a week. Got a response today that he was backpacking. Cool, I guess.
It started at 10:30 in the morning. Woken up by the ringing of my cell phone I answer groggily. It's a girl friend of mine who wants to discuss her man failures with me at 10:30 in the morning. Annoyance #1.
"why do these guys I sleep with want nothing to do with me other than to fuck me? It makes me feel like shit"
"Do you like them?"
"No, not really."
"Well, you can either sleep with them and just enjoy the sex and not feel bad about it or you can not sleep with them."
"I only sleep with them when I'm drunk."
"Don't drink so much..."
I'm not really one to give advice in this department, but it's loads easier to dole out advice than to follow it. Plus, this girl puts my drinking to shame. She gets blackout drunk every damn weekend. I drink a lot but rarely to the point of completely blacking out; just to the point of fuzzyish memories :(
Around 12:00 I gather up some motivation and make it out to the game. Of course we all drink for the two hours preceding the game so I'm fairly drunk by the time it starts. I then realize that it's sort of late and that I'm working that night so I start to walk back to the condo to get my car and drive home. I saw absolutely none of the game. Annoyance #2.
On my walk I'm approached by a man who starts to converse with me. Turns out he's a 29 year old grad student at my school and that's all I remember about him due to my prior alcohol intake. I'm pretty sure I gave him my number because I had a text of the friendly variety in my phone from an unknown number after work last night. He was pretty cute so maybe I'll hang out with him one of these days.
After I make it home I pass out. Fortunately I wake up just in time to prepare myself for a night of nudity. I'm still buzzed when I get to work, so in the spirit of saturday night I keep the buzz going with 3 or 4 vodka redbulls and some glasses of NUVO.
Being somewhat slow for a saturday night a friend and I decide to try a new style of hustle. We approach the customers and immediately sit on their laps. We angle ourselves so that our boobs are right in their faces and wiggle them a bit. Then we ask if they'd like to see us naked. This strategy was surprisingly effective and required little to no conversation. Score!
A regular of mine came in last night, but unfortunately he came in quite late and the vip rooms were booked for the rest of the evening. Instead of getting $400 out of him I only got $120. This was annoyance #3.
As the end of the night approached I went to the back to breathalyze and someone managed to not pass with a .098. WTF? I drank less than normal at work so I guess the drinking earlier in the day combined with the fact that I hadn't eaten any actual food that day caused me to fail. This was annoyance #4 as none of the girls who normally drive me home were there so I was forced to take a cab.
This means I was without my car most of the day today, until 7:00 when a work friend picked me up on her way to the club. I have no food in the house so I was starving all day and don't live within walking distance to any food. Annoyance #5.
I caved and texted the ex yesterday as I hadn't heard from him in a week. Got a response today that he was backpacking. Cool, I guess.
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Pornography today.
Work last night was pretty easy.
The little asian came in and I sat with him until I chose I leave early at 1:00.
I've gotten into the (bad?) habit of refusing to dance for certain customers. Not customers that I know are dirty or obnoxious, just customers that I don't even know.
I get kind of annoyed when they ask, so I tell them that I'll be over in 5 minutes and then just never go back.
I suppose it's bad business practice and I'm missing out on money but there you have it.
I'm just frustrated with men as a whole right now. Not customers or boyfriends or one specific group of males, but all of them. I'm frustrated by how men talk about and view women.
I honestly feel like a lot of this stems from the porn that's so prevalent today. Seems like most porn today consists of nasty, degrading shit aimed towards the woman. It's not about sex that both partners enjoy, but brutalizing the woman. All that seems to be out there these days is shit like "nasty slut gets ripped apart in every hole.'
I mean seriously?
Is this what men want sex to be like? Is this the male fantasy? Clearly most porn is aimed towards men because let's face it, men are the main consumers of porn. So if this is what's popular is must be because this is what most men want to see.
Nearly all men look at porn, and I don't think there's anything wrong with that. Jacking off is natural and having materials to fuel that activity seems fine. It's just the content that's a bit disturbing. I feel like young (and not so young) boys see the porn of today and think that it's ok or normal. That women should be treated as nothing more than fuck holes and whether or not they enjoy it is irrelevant.
I wish men could see girls as something more than something for them to stick their dicks into and realize that they are people with feelings and desires and emotions.
Today it seems that sex isn't something you do with a woman, but something you do to a woman. This mentality disturbs me and causes me to resent men. Oh well.
The little asian came in and I sat with him until I chose I leave early at 1:00.
I've gotten into the (bad?) habit of refusing to dance for certain customers. Not customers that I know are dirty or obnoxious, just customers that I don't even know.
I get kind of annoyed when they ask, so I tell them that I'll be over in 5 minutes and then just never go back.
I suppose it's bad business practice and I'm missing out on money but there you have it.
I'm just frustrated with men as a whole right now. Not customers or boyfriends or one specific group of males, but all of them. I'm frustrated by how men talk about and view women.
I honestly feel like a lot of this stems from the porn that's so prevalent today. Seems like most porn today consists of nasty, degrading shit aimed towards the woman. It's not about sex that both partners enjoy, but brutalizing the woman. All that seems to be out there these days is shit like "nasty slut gets ripped apart in every hole.'
I mean seriously?
Is this what men want sex to be like? Is this the male fantasy? Clearly most porn is aimed towards men because let's face it, men are the main consumers of porn. So if this is what's popular is must be because this is what most men want to see.
Nearly all men look at porn, and I don't think there's anything wrong with that. Jacking off is natural and having materials to fuel that activity seems fine. It's just the content that's a bit disturbing. I feel like young (and not so young) boys see the porn of today and think that it's ok or normal. That women should be treated as nothing more than fuck holes and whether or not they enjoy it is irrelevant.
I wish men could see girls as something more than something for them to stick their dicks into and realize that they are people with feelings and desires and emotions.
Today it seems that sex isn't something you do with a woman, but something you do to a woman. This mentality disturbs me and causes me to resent men. Oh well.
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
A bit from the past
Work was...alcohol fueled tonight. Made over $500, so not too bad. Plus I'm in possession of my car.
I'm going to post the email I sent the ex after we decided to part ways (as roommates ;). Maybe this will give you some insght into our relationship...
I'm done with all the whiny pitiful bullshit. I think both you and I know that it's not really me. It really never had worked on you, and I have to say that I like that about you-but I'll get to that later.
I'm going to start from the beginning, well, sort of.
Back in October of 08 I was cruising around on Craigslist (it's an addiction, I swear) in the roommate section 'cause I was getting a little bored of living alone and I stumbled upon an ad that seemed familiar. Low and behold it was yours! You really shouldn't have put your name at the bottom, if you hadn't I might not have been so sure and probably would have never contacted you again, but hindsight is 20/20. Anyways, the contents of the ad led me to two conclusions; your current roommate had vacated and you probably weren't getting back together with Name Redacted (like no one saw that coming).
It was then and there that I decided I was going to try and get you to be my roommate. Why? Well, I was bored and it seemed like a nifty little challenge, plus you always kind of intrigued me. Anyways, I decided the best bet would be for me to contact you on your birthday because let's admit, who isn't flattered that someone whom they haven't talked to in a while has remembered their b-day. From that point on it was actually easier than I expected, I honestly didn't expect you to be so open to talking with me again.
Anyways, I started throwing out not so subtle hints about needing a roommate and all that jazz so that you could be the one to suggest it. I've noticed it's always best to let men think they're the ones' coming up with the ideas. That was it-mission accomplished. So yes, it was pretty 'dramatic' of me I suppose.
Now I really did like you as much as I can like anybody. Disregarding the fact that I think you're delusional and you believe all sorts of spiritual bullshit, I think there's an intelligent person underneath all that. I'm not sure if I care about you as a person, because I don't really understand what that means or how one knows those things. Maybe deep down I hoped that if I spent a little more time with you you'd come out and be like "joking! I'm not really a religious freak who latches onto every crackpot theory to make my life easier to cope with!!!" and I'd be able to really respect you as a human being. Oh well, clearly that's not going to happen.
I've always liked to push people's buttons. I used to do it with my father all the time. You aren't really that easy though...I've only seen you show anger towards me a handful of times, and you can bet I counted each of those times as a win for me. Immature? Yes. I liked the fact that you didn't buy into my 'pity me' crap (and I really did go pretty far with that, not really easy for me). It seems to work on most people I've encountered.
I don't think I really thought things out too well concerning our cohabitation (sorry for the large word, I know you hate those) because I sort of forgot about the whole actually living together part. I was really only concerned with the challenge of getting you to aagree (well, suggest) it.
I have to say I'm surprised at how possessive I got at the thought of you going out and fucking around with girls, that's not reall like me. I really have no desire to have sex with you (or anyone, for that matter); maybe it's just jealousy of your ability to have normal relationships. I remember getting pissed of when Name Redacted would do the same thing.
Anyways, I'm not making myself out to be some diabolical genius or anything, though I've always had a bit of a superiority complex.
As far as the apartment is concerned, I'm sure I'll be able to get a roommate by the 1st of September-not that I was kicking you out or anything, it's just that the whole thing wasn't as fun as I had imagined. Even if I can't, you not paying for your seven days, while dickish on your part considering you are choosing to leave early, is fine. It's not as if I'm broke.
Well, clearly there's no need for a response on your part. The whole thing could have actually been pages longer, but I figured you'd be getting bored by now, so I might as well chop it off.
No hard feelings!
So, there you have it. That email is from August 2009, after we decided we shouldn't be roommates.
I'm going to post the email I sent the ex after we decided to part ways (as roommates ;). Maybe this will give you some insght into our relationship...
I'm done with all the whiny pitiful bullshit. I think both you and I know that it's not really me. It really never had worked on you, and I have to say that I like that about you-but I'll get to that later.
I'm going to start from the beginning, well, sort of.
Back in October of 08 I was cruising around on Craigslist (it's an addiction, I swear) in the roommate section 'cause I was getting a little bored of living alone and I stumbled upon an ad that seemed familiar. Low and behold it was yours! You really shouldn't have put your name at the bottom, if you hadn't I might not have been so sure and probably would have never contacted you again, but hindsight is 20/20. Anyways, the contents of the ad led me to two conclusions; your current roommate had vacated and you probably weren't getting back together with Name Redacted (like no one saw that coming).
It was then and there that I decided I was going to try and get you to be my roommate. Why? Well, I was bored and it seemed like a nifty little challenge, plus you always kind of intrigued me. Anyways, I decided the best bet would be for me to contact you on your birthday because let's admit, who isn't flattered that someone whom they haven't talked to in a while has remembered their b-day. From that point on it was actually easier than I expected, I honestly didn't expect you to be so open to talking with me again.
Anyways, I started throwing out not so subtle hints about needing a roommate and all that jazz so that you could be the one to suggest it. I've noticed it's always best to let men think they're the ones' coming up with the ideas. That was it-mission accomplished. So yes, it was pretty 'dramatic' of me I suppose.
Now I really did like you as much as I can like anybody. Disregarding the fact that I think you're delusional and you believe all sorts of spiritual bullshit, I think there's an intelligent person underneath all that. I'm not sure if I care about you as a person, because I don't really understand what that means or how one knows those things. Maybe deep down I hoped that if I spent a little more time with you you'd come out and be like "joking! I'm not really a religious freak who latches onto every crackpot theory to make my life easier to cope with!!!" and I'd be able to really respect you as a human being. Oh well, clearly that's not going to happen.
I've always liked to push people's buttons. I used to do it with my father all the time. You aren't really that easy though...I've only seen you show anger towards me a handful of times, and you can bet I counted each of those times as a win for me. Immature? Yes. I liked the fact that you didn't buy into my 'pity me' crap (and I really did go pretty far with that, not really easy for me). It seems to work on most people I've encountered.
I don't think I really thought things out too well concerning our cohabitation (sorry for the large word, I know you hate those) because I sort of forgot about the whole actually living together part. I was really only concerned with the challenge of getting you to aagree (well, suggest) it.
I have to say I'm surprised at how possessive I got at the thought of you going out and fucking around with girls, that's not reall like me. I really have no desire to have sex with you (or anyone, for that matter); maybe it's just jealousy of your ability to have normal relationships. I remember getting pissed of when Name Redacted would do the same thing.
Anyways, I'm not making myself out to be some diabolical genius or anything, though I've always had a bit of a superiority complex.
As far as the apartment is concerned, I'm sure I'll be able to get a roommate by the 1st of September-not that I was kicking you out or anything, it's just that the whole thing wasn't as fun as I had imagined. Even if I can't, you not paying for your seven days, while dickish on your part considering you are choosing to leave early, is fine. It's not as if I'm broke.
Well, clearly there's no need for a response on your part. The whole thing could have actually been pages longer, but I figured you'd be getting bored by now, so I might as well chop it off.
No hard feelings!
So, there you have it. That email is from August 2009, after we decided we shouldn't be roommates.
Monday, October 4, 2010
And then there were none
So the other day I informed sugar daddy that I do not wish to continue this relationship.
He wanted to know if it was because he texted me too much (admittedly this was an issue; he would sometimes send me upwards of 30 texts a day. He did pay my phone bill for me, though), and I told him that wasn't the issue.
I told him I just didn't feel comfortable with the situation, and did not wish it to progress, especially sexually. He then pulled the whole "I hope we can still hang out as friends, blah blah blah..." crap.
"I really think it's best we just go our separate ways,"
and that was that. He's only sent me 2 texts since then, so I think the message got through. He also said I should keep the necklace, so yay!
Work on Thursday was fine, as was Saturday. Someone 'made it rain' on me when I was on stage on Thursday with over $100 in ones! That was probably the highlight of my night, especially since I was dancing to Skidrow.
I haven't been drinking at work lately, I mean nothing. Not even one shot. I have been downing crazy amounts of sugar free redbull, which is probably worse for me than vodka.
Come to think of it, I haven't had a drink since last Wednesday, when I hung out with sugar daddy. I'm not even committed to being an alcoholic.
The ex sent me an email last week (Thursday to be precise) telling me about an interview he had with a company (which happens to be located near where I live) and suggesting that we do lunch.
I wrote back that I was happy that the company seemed to like him and that my free days were Tuesday and Thursday. I also mentioned that I'm thinking about moving again soon because I'm starting to feel bored. I sent this email Friday morning.
So far no response...I made sure to keep the email as inoffensive as possible so I don't know what happened. I know sometimes he thinks it's clever to wait a few days to respond to my emails/texts for whatever reason (I think he's trying to convince me of how busy and fulfilling his life is), but I couldn't care less.
Now that I think about it, the whole idea of 'let's do lunch' seems kind of dumb. It's not like we're old friends who need to catch up or business partners discussing a new deal.
What- are we going to talk about how our relationship continues to be dysfunctional and how we may or may not communicate for the next 3 months. Maybe we'll discuss the reasons for continuing communication even though it's proven futile over the past 3 years in forming anything other than drama and confusion.
Yeah, now that I think it over I'm going to have to cancel on lunch...if he ever replies back that is.
Working tonight, hoping for big money.
He wanted to know if it was because he texted me too much (admittedly this was an issue; he would sometimes send me upwards of 30 texts a day. He did pay my phone bill for me, though), and I told him that wasn't the issue.
I told him I just didn't feel comfortable with the situation, and did not wish it to progress, especially sexually. He then pulled the whole "I hope we can still hang out as friends, blah blah blah..." crap.
"I really think it's best we just go our separate ways,"
and that was that. He's only sent me 2 texts since then, so I think the message got through. He also said I should keep the necklace, so yay!
Work on Thursday was fine, as was Saturday. Someone 'made it rain' on me when I was on stage on Thursday with over $100 in ones! That was probably the highlight of my night, especially since I was dancing to Skidrow.
I haven't been drinking at work lately, I mean nothing. Not even one shot. I have been downing crazy amounts of sugar free redbull, which is probably worse for me than vodka.
Come to think of it, I haven't had a drink since last Wednesday, when I hung out with sugar daddy. I'm not even committed to being an alcoholic.
The ex sent me an email last week (Thursday to be precise) telling me about an interview he had with a company (which happens to be located near where I live) and suggesting that we do lunch.
I wrote back that I was happy that the company seemed to like him and that my free days were Tuesday and Thursday. I also mentioned that I'm thinking about moving again soon because I'm starting to feel bored. I sent this email Friday morning.
So far no response...I made sure to keep the email as inoffensive as possible so I don't know what happened. I know sometimes he thinks it's clever to wait a few days to respond to my emails/texts for whatever reason (I think he's trying to convince me of how busy and fulfilling his life is), but I couldn't care less.
Now that I think about it, the whole idea of 'let's do lunch' seems kind of dumb. It's not like we're old friends who need to catch up or business partners discussing a new deal.
What- are we going to talk about how our relationship continues to be dysfunctional and how we may or may not communicate for the next 3 months. Maybe we'll discuss the reasons for continuing communication even though it's proven futile over the past 3 years in forming anything other than drama and confusion.
Yeah, now that I think it over I'm going to have to cancel on lunch...if he ever replies back that is.
Working tonight, hoping for big money.
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