On developing a personality

Worked monday, tuesday, wednesday, and thursday of last week. Complete and utter shit, every. single. day.

Monday was sad. I don't even remember it very well. Left at 1:00 with just over $200. Was able to drive home.

Tuesday was...slightly better than monday. Old asian man came in but didn't spend as much as usual. Left at one with just under $300. Once I got home I decided to polish off a bottle of vodka because I was mad about work sucking. Then I decided to email both colorado guy [sorry :)] and the ex. I'm pretty sure I also attached a picture of my boobs to the email. Sometimes I swear I'm 16 years old.

Wednesday I got trashed. The beginning of the night held promise. I made tons of money on stage and everyone seemed to love me. Unfortunately I drank. A lot.

My night in drinks went something like this:

~Two shots at the bar, stage.

~Sitting with a customer, three more shots.

~Friends join me-share two vodka redbulls.

~Share a hennessy cranberry with a friend.

~Join up with friend who is celebrating her birthday and drink a shot of patron.

~Random table, one more shot of vodka.

~Table with cute black guy-one shot of patron.

~Back to the bar for one more vodka redbull shared.

~Drink total: 12

Very unable to drive home.

I also remember hitting on my manager and maybe the bouncers. Of course they had to make fun of me all night thursday for being a lush.

Me and the birthday girl ended up splitting a cab and she crashed at my place. She was trashed and arguing with her hood rat boyfriend over the phone all night. He beats the shit out of her pretty regularly.

Thursday I took it easy on the alcohol. Did maybe 2 shots all night. Left early with just over $200. Acted really out of it all night. I think people probably thought I was on something.

I was talking with the bouncer who's in love with me (wants to fuck me) and he basically told me that I have a shitty personality and that I was born tall and skinny and pretty and get by on my looks so I never had to develop a good personality. For the record mr. bouncer, I like my personality and think I'm hilarious so I don't know what you're talking about.

I barely made a grand last week and worked four nights! Four fucking nights. It's weeks like these that make me feel like this job isn't worth it. I just have to remind myself that I made over 3 grand in one night a few weeks ago and that's how this crazy job goes.