Medicated

Well I finally bit the bullet and got me some meds. Legally, of course.

After being informed that I have succeeded in destroying my pancreas (who knew alcohol did that? - well I did, found out about that a while back) I decided that I wanted to keep that organ. In all honesty it's not 'destroyed' just pissed off and a bit sick; it will recover.

The doc I saw was kind of a weirdo. Also, I hadn't eaten in 3 days as per another doctor's orders, I guess this is how you heal a pancreas, so I may have been not all there. But the doctor was odd. I can't even accurately explain his mannerisms. Kind of reminded me of a customer I would have; not because he was creepy or perving out, just odd. Anyways after listening to him be strange for what seemed like eternity he gave me a bunch of free meds. I didn't even realize they could do such a thing. 3 months worth of this, 1.5 months worth of that...and so on. Once I got home I did some research and picked the one I thought would be the best for me. Today was the first day I took it, and I guess they don't kick in right away, so we'll see.

I actually felt pretty good today. Was pretty busy with xmas shopping and lunch dates and stuff. Not romantic lunch dates though. I actually cancelled on my date (that's twice now - he's probably over it at this point). I don't feel like dating right now (or ever, really) and I can't force it.

Still miss work though...My mom of all people actually said that maybe I should go back to the club. She said I seemed a lot happier and more confident when I was working. Ha.