Running away

So I moved out of colorado guy's place. I figured I better get out before I get too attached. After our little fight the other night he started talking about his feelings for me and I think maybe I freaked out a bit. In true sadsociopath fashion I ran away. I'm really regretting it I think. I feel sad and alone. I want to go back but then I feel like I'm being weak-I dunno. Plus living out of hotels is so expensive, I was saving so much money living there for free.

On another note I talked to the ex today and he was pretty upset because he found out his ex (the one he left me for) is getting married in a few months. I do feel bad for him. I know he really loves her and it must be crushing to watch the person you loved and we with get married to someone else. It must make you wonder what was so wrong with you that they didn't want to marry you. Oh well.

I'm in a hotel room right now, it's pretty nice. I miss the boy a lot but I do appreciate the real bed, cable TV and strong internet connection.