My roommate situation is not going well at all. He treats me terribly-and only me. I see how he acts with his 'friends' and family and it's night and day. The other day he had the audacity to tell me to buy him a whole new bottle of ketchup after I asked if I could use a little bit for my fries. We're talking a teaspoon sized amount.
This is after I've: driven him to and from his job while his car was in the shop, picked his drunk ass up from some bars downtown at 4:30 in the morning even though he was a complete asshole to me the entire week. Let him borrow money to go rock-climbing because his drunk ass lost his debit card. Then when I brought up an incident that happened a while ago involving him not letting me borrow a stamp he told me to 'not make this personal.' Fuck him.
I'm trying so hard to be nice to this man and it's not effective. I'm at my wits end and I don't know what to do. It's hard enough living with this person who I still inexplicably have feelings for. I cannot deal with his animosity towards me.
Last night I went out and ended up doing coke with some old married dude in the sleazy bathroom of a shitty little bar. My coping skills are obsolete.
Tonight I'm going into work because my regular is going to be there and I know he'll have plenty of drugs that I know I'm going to end up ingesting because I'm fucking miserable right now.
I just don't know what to do. Every day is painful and I just don't want to deal with anything any more.
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